wth

Why did I bring the big box* of death if I totally wasn’t going to use it?

I guess I used it briefly.

And I did add like 800 words in the course of today.

Which is probably less than useful considering I need to finish up the project I’m working on at home now. And I don’t know why I’d be able to do it faster at home. It’s ten pages of editing…

My life’s getting out of hand. Robyn said I was a good business investment, but I sometimes can’t help thinking I’m not cut out for this grown-up lifestyle. I’ve definitely gotten really bad at managing my finances. For example: I spent $60 today on something I just don’t have the money for.

I bought ( hopefully reputable ) ticket savings things for Dallas Stars games. I got three free tickets and buy one get one type things. I’m gonna offer my mom the buy one get one.

And I think I’m going to have to ask for the $50 she promised me. I don’t know. *sigh*

Basically, halloween involved a huge fight between her and I which ended with her revoking the gift she’d given me ( because I told her I didn’t really like it because it was NOT what she’d promised me and it wasn’t really anything that I cared about ) and telling me she was just going to give me $50 instead. Well…I’m dead broke and I’m supposed to be going to a NOWD ( Night of Writing Dangerously ) thing for NaNo and I’m supposed to be going to see Imogen Heap ( which I’m defs gonna have to cancel. I have no money ) and I’m supposed to be going to see Eisley ( which I most certainly do NOT want to cancel ) and…I’m broke.

Why did I buy that? That makes $100 straight out of my last check that I wasted. You see, having money like this is really bad for me.

So.

I’m going to start putting money in a “savings account.” But only a hypothetical account, because you have to have $500 or more to have a savings account now or you get like two hundred dollars in fines every month. >.<

I'm going to start plan where I write down how much i've "put in savings" and that money is going to be inaccessible to me. That way, maybe I'll stop dropping literally hundreds of dollars on fast food and entertainment that I really can't afford.

I don't even have a car! What the heck is that?!

The downside to all this is that my life is about to get a heck of a lot more boring. And I'm probably not going to eat very much anymore considering there's never anything at the commune to eat and my house is woefully understocked of anything even remotely edible by me ( other than tomato soup. Go tomato soup. ) which means starvation if I'm not buying food.

Oh! I just remembered we have rice and soy sauce. So…I'm making myself egg fried rice on a regular basis now.

And I'm supposed to be cleaning out the fridges.

And my room.

All this weekend.

So much for ever seeing Guppie ever again.

And I got stood up again.

And i can't move out because of financial restrictions but I really don't want to live at home anymore.

dru is not in a good mood.

Can you tell?

Maybe when I get a car I won't feel so trapped.

But I can't get a car if I keep THROWING MY FUCKING MONEY AWAY!

grr.

xxdruxx

*Guppie’s Computer Case. It’s huge and looks like it could very easily contain a bomb.

 

Blehck

I find the smell of peanut butter to be overwhelming and rather gross.

Blegh.

Like how I blog a lot when I can’t tweet?

OIWEJGOIHB!

Love slacker radio so much =)

xxdruxx

 

Leave a message at the tone

So…I’ve once again gone on twitter strike. This time because I want to announce with my 10kth ( Ten-Thousandth ) tweet that I’ve reached 50k for NaNoWriMo.

But I’ve also lost my cell phone. It’s somewhere around the commune or Pat or something. I’m sure. But it’s most definitely not with me and it’s completely dead.

This means that not only can I not tweet avidly, but I also can’t text anyone.

So…

What I would love for you to do is, if you know my number ( which most of you do that are reading this bloggit ), call me and leave me a voice message so, when I find my phone, I have messages of love. Please? My voicemail’s really cool ( It’s me, singing ) and I love having messages.

So…yeah. Text me or leave me a voicemail ( or both! ) and I’ll love you forever. I’ll even do a “BLOG OF LOVES!!!” listing those people that left me love =)

My NaNoWriMo novel is called Pitter-Pat. ( The period is actually part of the title. ) and it’s about a girl named Skye. It’s going to be totally awesome when it’s done. I’m super, super excited. =D

And it counts for one of the things to do ( write a book and get it published. )

Incidentally, I finished the “Make a One Minute Movie” one yesterday but it didn’t work when I uploaded it to youtube because WMG owns the music I used ( Coming Clean by Green Day ) so it got stripped. I’m going to try and fix it but I don’t know if it’ll work…If it doesn’t I’ll figure something out so you can see it =D

xxdruxx

 

Ellipses…

New blogger! His name’s paul. And he and Steph may infect the blog with sweetness. >.<

Lol =D

I'll blog more when I'm not at work…

xxdruxx

 

mm

I want everyone to look at my profile and think I’m a dumb kid who doesn’t know anything about anything.

Then I want them to read something I’ve written.

Then I want them to pass out from ill-placed assumption.

I’m confident about my skills.

xxdruxx

 

Couches

Good morning bloggers

It’s very nearly time to get up and face the day. And how I wish I didn’t have to.

I slept on the floor last night because the couch isn’t comfortable for two. And because I couldn’t not sleep in his arms.

But, how I love couches. Everything was perfect – we decided to watch Van Helsing – which, btw, is the highest budget B-movie I’ve ever seen in my life – and we were curled up together on the couch being happy.

Then something shifted and I started playin the games I used to play with dan. The mind games where, for some reason, I get this huge, huge pleasure out of hurting him mentally. And I just kept pushing until we both ended up hurting lotses. I sometimes wish Dan could share some of the secrets of survival with the people I’m with. Then I realize how insensitive that would be and how he would never ever do that because he still wants me to come home.

Guppie pointed out that, theoretically I could call Dan at nearly any point and beg and be with him until the day I died. I don’t know if that would work, in practice, but it certainly makes Gup nervous. :/

It just makes me sad. I don’t want him to hurt for me anymore. I want us to be happy friends and hang out and be wonderful together. But – as Dan has rightly pointed out in the past – we’ll never be just friends. There’s just too much past and too much love for that.

So… Couches are wonderful places. You can blog on iPhones from them. You can kiss your lover on them. You can nearly break your own heart on them. You can rest you feet when they sting from running barefoot down the cold wet road in front of your house at 1am.

You can build real love – that doesn’t just go skin deep – and overcome ( or try to overcome, at least ) your fear of loss of interest and rejection and abandonment and make something real. And for that opportunity, at this moment in history, with the man that’s sleeping next to me, I thank you.

I thank you, Dan, Kevin, Jon…

Thank you for letting me go. Even of you didn’t want to. Even if you didn’t mean to. Even if I didn’t want you to.

I love you, Dan. You’re the only thing I don’t regret.

xxdruxx

 

LOL!

Funniest article ever.

Seriously

I can haz brainz?

specially since I rape all of those sites on a regular basis. *nod*

xxdruxx

{ PS – I totally can’t believe Zombies wasn’t already a tag. Wtf?! }

[ edit: and this one too. ]

 

Weekend

The weekend is upon us and it’s time to reveal what my plans are…

Well, no. It’s not. I’ll do that later =D

But I will tell you that I remembered what it is that I had scheduled tonight. Rocky Horror shadow cast = playing at Movie Tavern. I was gonna go see it. But, whatever.

I’ve also been invited by two separate people to do two separate things tonight AND invited Guppie out at like midnight ( even though I have to be awake at 7 ) when I knew fine well that I wouldn’t be sleeping since I’m helping JD get ready for a dance tonight. So…I’m stupid. lol =) I enjoy being a little social bug way too much and therefore way overstretch myself.

And I fell asleep at work today. Not for very long ( like 6 minutes ) and it was more of a doze than an actual nap. But, still….

I’m going to Blake’s though. I know that. I think it’s funny how the one thing that got the most votes on the poll ( Sleep ) is probably what’s going to happen the least this weekend. Oh wellz =D

xxdruxx

xxdruxx

[ haha, I typed it twice then decided to leave it. XD! ]

[ ps and and and, I have band practice 11 - 1 on sunday. When the crap am i going to A) See the garage [ maybe tomorrow afternoon? I know that some of my guys are all about the costumes and make up. Maybe someone will help me look amazingly awesome for the party ] B) Sleep?! [ We all know that Guppie + Dru = The Opposite of Sleep. Seriously. We counted FREAKING SPAGHETTI O'S to avoid sleeping. Wtf. ] But it’s okay. I’m glad I’m gonna be with the band again. And sunday I’m just going to insist on bed time around 6.30 or 7.

[ it's four-forty-two. 4.42. This blog was brought to you by awesome. xx ] ]

 

Double booking

This weekend.

Ohhh emgee.

Saturday = 7am Church Cleaning ( yeah, I signed up. So what? )
8.55pm Bday Party for friend Amanda ( of the Easter Bunny )
9.00pm Bday Party with friend Blake ( of the computer programming and my short-lived obsession. ) [ not even sure about this. The invite was totally random and slightly reeked of "invite all of your friends on fb in the area" ]

Which is only slightly death inducing. Thing is…I want to hang out with the Garage. Which means…I’d have to ditch at least the last two items. Well…maybe not Amanda’s party because it gets over at like 11 or something which means I could go out to Haltom afterwards. But the other one goes until 3am and definitely = no Garage.

Plus Friday night is pretty much a no-go because staying up till 4 then going to clean the church reeking of cigarette smoke is probably not the most constructive way to live a life.

So…Blogosphere ( if you’re out there, listening ) please enlighten me. What should I do? Vote below to decide my weekend. You can leave a comment below if you have other ideas/suggestions/quantifications of your choice.

I miss the bag piper in San Antonio. He was so cool.

xxdruxx

( No Garage Cat on this one because there are not actual descriptions of adventures in the Garage. So…tag instead. )

 

Lunch Is Bueno

I – just now – decided that the one word title kick thing I’ve been on is stupid. As such, I’m going to resume my normal “I make really random titles!” form. =D

Lunch = Cheese Nachos from Taco Bueno. So yummy. Only problem is that they’re from the store on University meaning the salsa ( which is made fresh in store every night ) is nowhere near as good as the salsa from the Bueno on Ft Worth Drive.

And some of the chips were undercooked meaning they tasted stale.

But, whatever. For $2.05 it was a ridiculously small and overpriced. But let’s assume the price was smaller. For $1.54 it was delicious and totally yums.

Random news item of the day: I miss Guppie. =( And Andrew unsubscribed. I’m pretty sure that he thinks I don’t want to talk to him since I rarely reply to his txts. But he usually txts me either when I’m busy or asleep ( the other morning, for example, he txted me at like 3.48 or some such nonsense at which point I was simultaneously busy AND asleep. ) and then I forget to txt him back. Because I have a stellar memory like that. Ask Drew [ Taco Bueno Drew, not Andrew ]. I totally promised to call him back last night then fell asleep completely forgetting to call him. :/

Point is, I don’t like it when my friends think I hate their guts because I forget to txt them back. And he unsubscribed from the blog ( after sending me Goodbyes by txt and twitter. ) so…I’m worried. Andrew and I have been friends for years and have known each other for years and years before that.

So…yeah. I called him and left him 2 msgs. So if he replies, I’ll make a point to drop what I’m doing to reply to him. If he doesn’t…I guess he doesn’t want anything to do with me anymore.

Sad days.

And I still miss Guppie.

xxdruxx