Let’s talk about what is appropriate and what isn’t.
Self-serving questions like “Did he cheat? Did he lose interest?” and violently selfish comments like “I don’t appreciate being sent on a hunt if y’all are still together.” are not okay. Even if we were sisters they would be inappropriate and unappreciated. But from vague acquaintances, it is wholly unacceptable.
Allow me to offer some tips for speaking to the recently forsaken:
Ask if the person is okay, before you ask anything else. Saying “I ask specific questions. I’m not like everyone else.” is not an excuse. It doesn’t mean you’re a good friend for asking what you’re thinking. It means that you’re more worried about the juicy details than you are about your alleged friend’s mental state. The first thing you should worry about is how they’re doing. And if you aren’t actually worried about that first, have the fucking decency to lie and make yourself look better and them feel better.
Don’t be flippant. Ever. Unless you’re offering to help hide the body. “Oh, did he cheat?” ‘Yes. With my gorram sister.’ Do you really want to be the douchebag on the other end of that conversation.
Offer condolences instead of asking questions. If we want to talk about it, we will. If we don’t, you’ll either have to live with your curiosity or head to our facebooks, twitter, YouTube or blog to read our pathetic emotional break downs, as they happen. Though, chances are, if you don’t know we split up a month after the fact and you were only testing us in the first place because “I’m bored! You and your boyfriend should come pick me up lol ;D!” then you’re not really a very good friend.
And no, it’s not just because you ask the “wrong” questions.