Bitch Beer

Bitch beer is stuff like Smirnoff Ice or Mike’s Hard Lemonade or Arbor Mist. It is made of fruit and happiness. It is what we were drinking the other night. Wednesday? Idk. It’s what I was drinking tonight whilst packing.

I’m in the car with my family – yeah! I have family; namely three aunts, two point five uncles, myriad cousins and a grandfather – heading toward Missouri. We’re going to go see a show that my granddad wanted to see and to generally be together. This is my first extended family – are they extended if they’re all you have? – vacation and I’m so excited.

I also really have to pee. Turns out that having two bottles of Smirnoff, a bottle of mike’s hard lemonade and a ton of cran-apple juice for dinner then forgetting to go to the bathroom before you get in the car for a 10 hour car ride is a bad idea. Who knew? ^-^’


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